When You Just Don't Know What To Say 1/5/2017

Good Morning,

I can follow the aroma of the Door County Jingle Bell Java Coffee right to the kitchen where my cup awaits me. Friday is here and I won't do anything to slow down the day. My goal is to return home and start the weekend.

I just experienced one of those times when I just didn't know what to say to someone who was in deep grief over the death of a loved one. All of my studies and experience just never prepares you to have the right words to say when someone has suffered the loss of a loved one. Nothing sounds right when you try to console someone who has just watched their spouse walk away from a marriage. What do you say when a teenager asks why did God allow their parent to die?

Matthew 5:4New International Version (NIV)

⁴ Blessed are those who mourn,
    for they will be comforted.

We all have said "call me if you need anything" to someone who is experiencing a great loss. Our chaplain at the hospital spoke to us the other day on how lame that statement really is. No one ever calls, they don't want to be a bother.

So here is what you do. Pray and ask God to show you what you can do. Ask if you can mow the grass, do the laundry, or drive the kids to school. Bring a meal to the hurting house and tell them that you love them. Everyone loves pasta. Ask to assist with writing thank you notes. Send flowers to the home, not as a memorial but a bouquet of cheer. Actions often are better than words. So before you say "I know exactly how you feel" pray and repeat those words to yourself. Would you want to hear those words from someone else if the roles were reversed? Probably not! Sometimes it's best to listen and the hurting person will lead you right to how you can help. Be a good listener.

So kick in the prayer power and ask God for wisdom. I will bet He shows you what to do.

Have a great Friday,

Marty