There is no doubt in my mind this fine morning that it is cold outside. When our dog goes out and does not have to be whistled at to come in, it's cold. He went out and was back at the door in seconds.
I am drinking a hearty cup of Door County Hawaiian Hazelnut Coffee as a write. The house is plenty warm and the pot of soup is already simmering.
Today many people will exchange a gift or two, to participate in Valentine's Day. I am not gong to write about the day itself, whether it should or should not be observed that's a personal preference for each of us to consider. I for one was at the jewelry store last night. "Every kiss begins with Kay".
One gift that we both learned to give each other many, many years ago on an as needed basis was to communicate with each other in a way that would honor God.
Now every couple will have differences. I wish Rene was perfect but she isn't. Although I like to think that I am perfect she will step up an admit for me that I am not. So over the years our lack of perfection has caused from time to time differences. We will both have an opinion of what is right or wrong. But long ago we decided on a Biblical ground rule. "We will talk it out".
Proverbs 15:1 New King James Version (NKJV)
15 A soft answer turns away wrath,
But a harsh word stirs up anger.
But a harsh word stirs up anger.
This meant we needed to add some ground rules to the ground rule. When angry with each other, we stop and pray out loud together asking God to show us how to handle the situation. We pray for ourselves. This avoids a prayer that preaches to the other person and becomes a null prayer. We ask for the Holy Spirit to calm our hearts and minds. Notice the prayer happens with each of us in the same room. We also agreed to not practice the "silent treatment tactic". Take Note that the Bible verse above says "a soft answer" it does not say "no answer". The silent treatment just stirs up more anger the same as a harsh word does. This has worked for us as we from time to time struggle through my imperfections and Rene's self proclaimed perfections. We have been married for a 1000 years now and we are looking forward to 1000 more till death do us part.
So if today you are exchanging chocolates and goo goo eye looks at each other how about giving the gift of communication during troubled times and do it with a Biblical approach? This works with spouses, friends, and family too. It just needs to be seen as God's way to communicate during differences. It takes two willing partners. I think it is easiest in a marriage though where two people are committed to putting the other first. But that's a whole different message for tomorrow.
Well enjoy the day.
Marty
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